Life in Hollywood, below-the-line

Life in Hollywood, below-the-line
Work gloves at the end of the 2006/2007 television season (photo by Richard Blair)

Sunday, April 13, 2014

Crew Call Podcast

                                 Yeah, it was kind of like this...

This isn't a "real" post -- just another feeble effort before I strap myself in, fire up the boosters, and blast off for a brief visit to the Home Planet, a barren outland of anemic and intermittent Internet access where posting anything at all is highly unlikely.  I fully intended to put something real up here by now, but having been whipped and beaten to a bloody pulp coming down the stretch to close out and wrap Season 3B (don't ask...) on my show, I've had no energy to stare into this blank screen hoping the words will come.

All in good time, my little droogies, all in good time...

For those who don't already know, The Anonymous Production Assistant has launched a Kickstarter campaign to fund a podcast featuring interviews with industry professionals, wherein said industry pros answer questions designed to provide an insider's look at what they actually do on set.  You can read all about it here, where you will learn that I am among the early subjects -- or "Guinea pigs," in TAPA's words -- along with "D" of Dollygrippery  and Nathan of  Polybloggimous, a veteran location manager with some great stories to tell.  

I've no doubt that "D" and Nathan will acquit themselves honorably and well, but my own effort was marred by the pulsing greenish glow of a Sunday morning hangover that left my head as empty as the Mojave desert and my tongue as sluggish as an arthritic Gila Monster.  I fumbled and stumbled my way through that interview like a three-sheets-to-the-wind drunk who somehow wandered into a shooting gallery -- the kind with real bullets, not hypodermic needles.

The experience of being interviewed under such conditions cured me of any lingering desire I may have harbored to spread my internet wings beyond the realm of the printed word, which means I'll stay behind the keyboard -- and avoid microphones of any sort -- for the next twenty or thirty years.

Still, I choose to look at the bright side.  In setting such a preposterously low bar, I took one for the club, enabling all future Crew Call podcast interviewees the great luxury of being able to say "Hey, at least I wasn't as bad as that fucking juicer."

And if that's not much, it's all I've got.  They'll thank me some day...

You can see -- or hear -- for yourself when it finally launches.  Personally, I think the podcast is an excellent idea, with TAPA the perfect choice to run it... and once it gets past my own dubious contribution, should turn into something really worth listening to.

But that's for you to decide.

Meanwhile, the countdown clock is ticking, Zero Hour draws near, and in all the ways that matter, I'm already gone...


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